Where do i begin..

Okay Hiiiiiiii so i am Rubii...

This is my first offical post... yeeeee exciting....

Have never done this before so here goes...

I aim to use this blog to vent coz i have a lack of real friends and hope to make some new ones from all corners and nooks and crannies of this sometimes cruel but beautiful and quirky world.

First i will tell you a bit about myself so you can decide if my blog is right for you!!!!

So i am a 26 year old from South Australia, Australia... I match my starsign (which is LEO) to a T.

I live with my Boyfriend of 7 years.... And am now deciding what direction i want my life to go in. Up until now i have had no idea what i have wanted to do and have just been pottering along filling time in the many different jobs that i have not been happy in... Well i have decided that i want to do something where i can help and look forward to going to work... EVERY SINGLE DAY...

I want to study to become a Vet Nurse... My love of animals would become stronger... i would learn the most interesting things and get to help the poor animals in their times of need. I realized i really wanted to do this when i took a liking to a local Vet show... i didn't particularly fall in love with the main vet but the second one that works in a different surgery. i previously had 2 cats that i unfortunatly had to re-home when i had to move house. i feel so lost without them everyday and would love to have a whole different range of pets to play with, look after... and fall in love with every day.

Only problem with wanting to do this is that i would have to move back home with my rents... Due to only being able to work weekends and a few nights due to full time study for 2 years i would not be able to afford to not live there. My boyfriend thinks this means i want to break up and not be together anymore but it does in no way mean that... i want to do this so i can have a long and joyful life doing something i love. My boy is more than welcome to come live with me at my rents however i dont think he will... so you can see my pickle... i dont understand how he can make me feel guilty for wanting to start a career.

So i am stuck between a rock and a hard place...

I am also stuck in a rut at the moment with other things too... Current job (hence why i want to change directions) , Health (trying to find out whats wrong sucks the big one.), Friends and general life.

Not know whats going on in my mind is hard. Not being able to sleep coz my brain wont stop ticking is even harder... And then even harder than that is being judged for who i am and how i try to deal with my life.

So i am making myself a promise and YOU as my witness i pledge...

 i Rubii, Promise to try my hardest in life, Not give up, or give into anyone who doesnt believe in me. I promise to look after myself and look out for number 1.... ME!!!! Starting now i am going to try to be healthier, happier and more positive.

So i think i have have said enough now....

Signing off

Rubii luvs u... xox